Dear Coach Greg: My boyfriend and I have been dating for over 6 months. Most of the time he is thoughtful, very funny, and he often gives me his undivided attention. I thought that we were getting really close and ready to make a "formal commitment", but then he seems to pull away. I leave messages for him but it takes him awhile to respond, and then he acts like nothing is wrong. Am I being overly needy or are we not as compatible as I thought we were?
Wherefore Art Thou Romeo?
Dear Wherefore Art Thou Romeo: So many questions (to ask you) and so little time. My first question is: What kind of "formal commitment" are you looking for after dating for 6 months? Are you ready to make the same "formal commitment" to him? If not, then you might want to be patient with this relationship before going to the next level. Just like any loving long-term relationship, you need to really get to know all aspects of your potential partner which takes time and keeping your eyes wide open.
If he is giving you "mixed messages" then he may need even more time than you to sort out his feelings. Be yourself while dating so that each of you can give and receive accurate information about each other and how you feel about yourself after each date. Keeping a "Dating Log" will let you know if you are being overly needy/he is pulling away, and if you are compatible in the areas that really matter (emotionally, intellectually, physically, and spiritually).
For monthly relationship preparation support and interaction with like minded singles go to:
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Relationship Coaching for Singles (Singles Support Group).
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