"Grandkids are the best! You enjoy the good times, and when they start acting up, you give them back to mom and dad."

We've all heard this from grandparents, a reference to the uniquely fun and stress-free relationship between a grandparent and grandchild. However, for the increasing number of grandparents who are raising their grandchildren, this relationship is far more complicated. Statistics indicate that close to 8 million children in the United States are being raised by a grandparent. These grandparents have become the primary caregivers due to a variety of parental circumstances which may include incarceration, drug and alcohol addiction or even death.

Parenting isn't easy. Parenting your children's children is even harder, as grandparents face a whole new set of challenges at a time in their lives when they least expect it. Many children whose parents are not their active caregiver can suffer from emotional and psychological difficulties and they often blame themselves for their parents' problems. They are more vulnerable to a multitude of potential issues due to separation from their parents, and they may have suffered abuse or neglect at the hands of their parents before being removed from the situation.

The emotional and financial toll that parenting again can take on a grandparent is immense. Retirement funds earmarked for vacations are now needed for other expenses. Dreams and plans for relaxing and enjoying the "Golden Years" are replaced with pediatrician appointments, homework and after-school activities.

For grandparents parenting again in Martin and St. Lucie County there is help. GRAND (Great Relationships Achieve Noble Dreams) is a free "grandfamily" support group hosted by Tykes and Teens, a non-profit agency in Stuart. Grand meets twice a month and provides an opportunity for "grandfamilies" to get together with other families in similar situations.

At a recent GRAND meeting in Port Salerno caregivers chatted with each other while their grandchildren participated in an arts and crafts activity. The grandparents' conversations were like that of any other parents-talk of softball games and swim meets, of summer trips and barbecues. There were other conversations too however, unique to this special group of grandparents. These conversations were more serious-discussions of helping children cope with anxiety and depression, or of how to convince children that they are not at fault for their parent's choices.

After the children and their grandparents shared a meal together, the children played games with Martin County Parks and Recreation employees while the grandparents convened in a separate room with a therapist. There the grandparents were able to share their concerns, fears and triumphs with others who could understand the unique challenges and joys of raising a grandchild.

For grandparents who accept the daunting task of parenting their grandchildren, the GRAND program provides a vital support network. It also provides support for the children, as well as an opportunity for them to relax and have fun with other kids who are in similar situations. Additionally, children who are not being raised by their parents may be at higher risk of engaging in dangerous behaviors such as alcohol and drug abuse, and the GRAND program can address these issues as it is staffed with both a Prevention Specialist and Licensed Clinical Social Worker from Tykes and Teens.

The face of the American family is changing, and Tykes and Teens recognizes that healthy families are the cornerstone of a healthy community. Helping non-traditional families thrive and raise confident children is one of the many ways that Tykes and Teens enriches the lives of children and families in Martin County.

Tykes and Teens is a non-profit organization providing mental health and substance abuse prevention and treatment for children and teens. The GRAND program is only possible through the generosity and support of our community partners. For more information on how to help support the GRAND program by volunteering or making a donation, please call Lauren Espitia at 631-7653.

If you are a grandparent raising your grandchildren and you would like to participate in this FREE program, please call Tykes and Teens at 220-3439.